Doing vs. Being – which will get you the best results?
February 25, 2022
One pattern of behavior that is predictive of success is the ability to accept your situation as it is now while still being able to hold steady to your vision.
It’s about surrendering to the present, rather than fighting it. To paraphrase a truism: Make love with the present, not war.
People often blame themselves, others, or their situation for not being happy. That’s being a victim, abdicating responsibility for the past, present, and future. They see their circumstances and therefore their state of being as out of their control.
To gain more control, people grasp at what they want by “doing” more, thinking they’ll become more successful. They often flush tens of thousands of dollars in fertility treatments down the toilet as a result.
It’s actually a lot more beneficial to do less and just “be”. It’s way less stressful.
The constant doing feels productive but is, in effect, like being a hamster on a wheel. Doing a whole lot while remaining in the same place.
It’s the being-ness that allows you to move forward, as counterintuitive as it may seem.
What does it mean to “be”?
Part of it is to eliminate the desire for perfection. There’s an unrelenting need for everything to be perfect on the motherhood journey – like it has to be rainbows all along the way. In striving for perfection, that’s where all that “doing” comes in. Just let it “be”.
If it’s an incredibly messy (physically and emotionally) journey. embrace it for what it is. It won’t always be like that.
Every step of the way, you have the power of choice. You choose what you want to focus on…the opportunity for a lesson or the anxiety of not having what you want.
Choose your baby.
Image: Unsplash/ Max van den Oetelaar