How believing in soulmates can hurt your fertility

Do you believe in soulmates?

Your answer might reflect how well you’ll do on your fertility journey.

Guess how many Americans believe in soulmates?  I think you’ll be surprised.  According to some random poll, a whopping 73% of Americans believe in soulmates.

Slightly more men (74%) than women (71%) felt that there was one person meant for them.  That was surprising to me.  Logically speaking, it makes zero sense that with 7+ billion people on this planet, there is only 1 person meant to be with you.  So I thought men would be more analytical about this.  Wrong!

Researcher Raymond Knee found that people who believe in soulmates have a destiny belief.  You are destined to be with one person.

On the other hand, people who don’t believe in soulmates  have a growth mindset.  These people grow together and work towards cultivating their relationship.

Evidently, people in the soulmate camp are more likely to break up, give up, and have difficult relationships.  They tend to have short, intensely passionate relationships.  But when something goes wrong, they think that person isn’t right for them and move on to find the “perfect” one.

People NOT on the soulmate bandwagon tend to work things out.  They view compromise as a way to grow together.  They tend not to get bent out of shape about the inevitable relationship challenges.

So it got me thinking…

Fertility clients generally fall into 2 camps as well.

One group thinks that they’re destined to fail at getting pregnant because of their situation – maybe they think they’re too old or their diagnosis is an obstacle that can’t be overcome.  If you’re one of these people, you should really unsubscribe from these emails.  Nothing I say will make a difference.

The other group have the growth mindset.  These are my peeps!  The ones who believe it’s their responsibility to make the shifts needed to change their current situation.  They ask questions like “What can I do better?” or “What don’t I know that I need to know?”.  Questions that show the willingness to grow and adapt.

So I wonder how highly correlated  believing in soulmates is to your attitude towards your fertility?  I’m kinda feeling like they’re very closely linked

Cuz yours truly definitely ain’t drinking the soulmate Kool-Aid.  AND I’m most def of the growth mindset.

If you’re a destiny mindset kinda gal, it’ll serve you better to be a growth mindset chicky.  At least, on your fertility journey.

To help you grow your fertility mindset, coaching with me will turbocharge your progress:

All my best,
Julie Chang, L.Ac.
Natural Fertility Eggspurt